Travelling with people can be hard. If you don’t know ahead of time that you’re compatible for a weekend or a month long trip to the middle of nowhere, you’re pretty screwed when you find you’re not. What if that’s your boyfriend? For me, travelling is a big part of my life (as you can tell from this blog) and if I’m dating someone, they better be able to travel with me. Here are a few things I learned over the years about travelling with your boyfriend.
This is a given. I’ve travelled a few places on my own and I found it so freeing that I was able to do things on my own time. My boyfriend and I look for different things in a vacation. He enjoys relaxing and taking in the local lifestyle. I enjoy sightseeing and being on the go. On our first trip to Florida, we both made sure we had things that we were individually both interested in. He was interested in watching spring training baseball games. I was interested in going to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Then we spent the rest of the week doing things that we both wanted to do: shopping, eating and drinking.
- DON’T FORCE IT
I quickly found out that the boyfriend isn’t an outdoorsy type of person. In the past few months, I’ve been bugging him about a trip together next year. My choices were Macchu Picchu or Africa. He didn’t seem that interested in going to those places. I’ve, now, finally stopped bothering him about it. Obviously, if he doesn’t want to go, why not go with someone that will enjoy the trip as much as you do?
- PLAN BUT LEAVE SPACE FOR ADVENTURE
I’m a huge planner for activities. I can plan to the minute if I could. But over the years, I realized that that’s not how adventures are made. Sometimes the spontaneity is just what makes a good trip into a great one. Plus, if it’s not your first time going there, whatever happens would be the thing that sets the trip apart from the others.
- BE CLEAR
Make sure that both of you are on the same page towards things like budgets and hotel location. The downfall for many couples, I find, is that they have different expectations on what they’re getting out of the trip despite their constant communication. It’s just all about getting there, it’s actually following through with the budget you’ve spent. I went on a trip once with an ex but spent way more money than planned. Not knowingly, I was a bit bitter about it because I was making less money than him at the time.
- START SMALL
I think this is relatively obvious, but don’t plan to take a two week trip with your 3 month boyfriend to Asian where you know no one else. Go on a small trip that is one or two nights to test out the waters. I usually take a trip to Niagara before any other trips with boyfriends to test out the waters.
- ME TIME
I hear this is a thing people do when they travel as couples. I’ve never actually done this but it doesn’t hurt to go to the beach on your own to read, or take a walk around the block to separate yourself. I think with the notion of going on a trip, it’s expected to spend literally every second together because you’re going together. But if even at home you like your me time, you need it on vacation too.
- HANGRINESS AND TIREDNESS
Most people, like me, get hangry and grumpy when tired. Make sure when you feel tired or hangry, you step back and remind yourself that you’re on vacation. Sometimes you don’t notice it, but as you do normally, read your partner’s reactions and reflect. If your boyfriend is getting cranky, remind yourself that he is tired or hungry. Tell him and try to resolve the problem.
In any relationship, you’ll need this. If at home or at vacation. You might get in a fight or you might have to go off track. But be patient with each other and remember that you’re on vacation. It’s supposed to fun.
Good luck on your next trip with your partner. This is probably your first biggest test of your relationship. Keep in mind that vacations are supposed to be fun. Relationships are supposed to be (mostly) fun. Don’t make it hard for yourself or your partner.